Human Be Herd

Sunny Ski

Thea Fast 20.01.2015 Uncategorized 0

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Today I went out for a lovely ski with my dogs and camera. I’d like to add photos to my blogs, like from when the experience that inspired the blog happened. So I’ll work on learning to add a gallery of images to this one. First off we ran across what I think was a coyote where she caught a mouse under the snow. So I took a picture of that. Then I took a photo of each of the dogs. At the top of the hill, literally and metaphorically, I tried a few “selfies”.

I don’t know whether its my mennonite ancestry or what, but the whole selfie thing is something I’m pretty damn judgy about.

I have this inner caustic bitch that arises when I’m on facebook sneering, “oh look! another picture of you looking absolutely fabulous! Like the last 5 haven’t been enough?”. So perhaps its envy, that I wish I was that kind of pretty. Maybe its humility, that would be lovely but it tastes more like scorn.

So I have to laugh at how I tried to compensate. Perhaps, you can laugh too. My daughter says the background doesn’t matter in a selfie but I tried to make it matter. I thought if I can just get my head in the corner so they can see the incredible view! The place where, “Whoops, I took a photo of my finger”, turns into, “How did that pesky face get in there!?” Then I took a picture of the hill I ski down that makes me focus really hard on keeping my knees bent and soft and my core activated on that edge between “Wheeee!” and “Shiiit! I’m going too fast to wipe out without it hurting”.

Then down onto the lake shore where Keeta did her coyote imitation and I came across a crescent of cottonwoods I’d never noticed before. I was just telling Charlie yesterday about the article I posted on fb about the trees talking. Maybe I’ll try to post it here too. Anyway, I was agog at the huge old cottonwoods against the winter blue sky, I swear I could feel them. I offered my gratitude, “thank you” and then “I love you!” came out sounding like I was 5 and tears welled up in my eyes. One of my first memories of spiritual joy came back, we were on a family trip and had stopped in an old growth tree reserve and I was singing their praises and skipping through them with tears rolling down my cheeks, totally in rapture.

“Could have been the hormones”, I sung to myself to the tune of Wasn’t That A Party. And it turned into this….

Could have been the hormones. Might have been the bliss. Could have been the group momentum, I don’t know but look at the “shift” I’m in. My mind is like a whirlwind! I think its going to fry! Telling you, me oh me oh my, wasn’t that a workshop!

I sang it to myself and giggled the rest of the way home. You know you’re not insane when you at least know, you’re a little insane.